So we all know this famous saying...
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| source: google images |
Meaning just what it says. Live life with no regrets. Don't look back on anything you did in the past and think "I wish I didn't do that..." It's pretty good advice, actually (unless you're about to do something like rob a bank and say "No, it'll be totally fine because like, no regrets! YOLO, yeah guys?" Umm... no. Put the gun and the black ski mask down. Because you're gonna regret this).
But in all actuality, we probably all have some things in our lives we regret. I truly am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and that God honestly does have a much bigger plan for us and for the world than our little minds could ever even begin to comprehend, and that everything is working out the way it is supposed to for a purpose. I guess you could say I believe in fate instead of sheer coincidence. But even so, I have regrets.
I have a handful of regrets; a good-sized lump of regrets. And I'm here to share them with you so maybe you guys don't have to learn the hard way and avoid the mistakes I made. Take my situations and apply them to your own lives, by all means, have at it.
1.) My first regret is not walking in to that audition when I was four or five years old in New York City. I was a ham when I was younger: loved the camera, loved preforming, loved being the center of attention, knew from the second I could even form thoughts that I wanted to act and sing forever and ever and ever. I was not a shy child. So why, oh WHY did I refuse to get out of the car when my mom drove to the city so I could audition for some commercial or some agency or some children's clothing catalog thing, I don't even remember. I was so excited on the drive over, but all of a sudden, I became scared and I cried as we parked in front of a big brick building. I don't know why and this is my biggest regret to this day because I could've stuck my foot through the door at a very young age or I could have at least just gotten experience. Things might've been very different for me and my family growing up and now I'll never know.
2.) I regret not getting over my Zac Efron lookalike crush all throughout high school. Granted, he looked like Zac Efron so that made it a little bit more difficult, but seriously. Homeboy was playing me like I was a yo-yo. We liked each other but he would date other girls, and when they broke up, I would always come back to him, just like a yo-yo. He still had me on a string for so long! And even when I knew we'd never date and he wasn't really that into me anymore, I still liked him. For like, four or five years! He's a perfectly fine, nice, sweet guy now and such, but boys are silly in high school. (And college. Actually, all the time.) So yes, I regret not getting over him the first time he started dating another girl right after flirting hardcore with me on our youth group's annual ski trip because then I would've been more open to other great guys who liked me during that time (sooo, all of high school). I would've gone on more fun dates and just enjoyed my whole high school experience more than pining after this one dude (who looked like Zac Efron).
3.) I regret not standing up for myself as often as I should have. In middle school and high school, I had a lot of bossy friends. I guess that was just their personality types, and that's fine. I'm sure they have transitioned their bossiness into good leadership skills by now. I had some friends who I was intimidated by, and one or two friends that I was just kind of downright scared of. I walked on eggshells around these people, just wanting to please them and make them happy -- while, in turn, the friendship was draining me. I allowed myself to be walked on and taken advantage of a bit. I felt like I had to drop everything when people wanted me to or else I wasn't a good friend. When I had to tell my friend that I couldn't hang out because I was spending time with my family and they acted ticked at me because of it, I felt a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach all day long, and became a bit depressed because I thought they were mad at me. I should've gotten over it and realized that my life is not ruled by other people. I only give people the power to hurt me if I let them. I should have rid myself of the toxic relationships and then worked on the savable ones by overthrowing my doormat personality and just said "no" to people more often.
4.) I regret not spending more time with my mom. I love my mom so much. And I know she loves me like crazy. After two sons and two miscarriages, she had me at 38 years old. I'm her only daughter. I'm her little girl. And throughout high school and college, she has supported me with everything I've wanted to do... including this blog and my soon-to-be YouTube channel. I wish I made more concrete plans with her like I did with friends. I wish I went out to lunch with her more and talked, or went to the movies to see the latest rom-com more, or went shopping at the mall more -- all the things I would normally plan to do with a friend, I wish I made more plans like that with Mom. We love each other, we get on each other's nerves, we argue, we make each other laugh. And now as we both get older, I really am going to try to make an effort to do that. Starting with Thursday, when we're both going to try out a new salon in town and get our hair done. :)
So those are just some of my regrets... and did you notice anything that they all have in common? I never regret the things I have done. Like I said, everything happens for a reason. But my regrets are things that I did NOT do. I regret not taking these risks and these chances that would have improved my life and probably others lives as well. So the next time you're wondering if you should do something, just go and do it! Ask yourself if you will regret doing it or NOT doing it more... chances are, the answer is pretty much always going to be the latter. That way, you really can say you've lived a life with no regrets.
DISCLAIMER: Okay, obviously have common sense about it, people. If you're at a party and you know a guy has a girlfriend but he's really cute and flirting with you and you're thinking to yourself, "Welp, Desiree said to just live with no regrets and to just go for it whenever you're hesitant, so I'm going to kiss this guy" -- NO. DON'T DO IT. That's hedonistic and selfish and you'll hate yourself afterwards and if you don't, you need to go make some posters for your missing conscious. If you're driving along and your car breaks down and some dude drives up and offers you a ride and you have a sinking feeling in your stomach and it just seems sketchy, DON'T say to yourself, "Welp, you always miss 100% of the goals you never try for or whatever that sports related saying is that can also relate to everyday life" and DON'T GET IN THE CAR. If it could cause harm to you or others, then just no. Because you definitely will regret that.
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| source: google images |
Until next time!
xoxox
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